AmyB: Food For Thought

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly of AmyB WOE

Has It Been A Week? March 2, 2008

Filed under: Kimkins — amyb1569 @ 3:59 pm
Tags: , , , , ,

Yep. A week ago today I decided to take some time online and reach out to some of my KK threads. Goodness if I had known I was on my out , I would of handled things different. It seems like my last post were rather boring. I said a few hello’s. I wished a few a Blessed Sunday. Oh and my favorite ..I asked if flank steak was the same as flat iron steak. I still am not sure the answer to that question.

This last week has been a roller coaster. I have gotten so much support. Thank You all. I now have learned that I was not strong enough to leave on my own. I had thought many times before I needed to leave. I needed to stand up for what I believe in. I reached out to many people. Becky, Christian, Deni and even TT. They all said the same thing. Becky was so very blunt it was hard to read. The truth is hard to read. So what do you do with that truth? Put it in your get back to folder. The thing that still surprises me is….I knew that what they said was true. I wanted to not believe them. But in the dark of the night, I KNEW and I STAYED. I have said before…Last Sunday It was like God reached down and kissed me on the cheek and said…..since I know you do want the right thing and have not yet…I will help you. You are BANNED. May sound crazy but true.

So I got to thinking …why would I stay when I knew or was pretty darn sure she was not telling the whole truth. I am not sure. I do know that when it was found that she was still heavy….I felt bad for her. Thinking back about this….It was more that she was fat and maybe embarrassed vs she lied over and over. Heck I was fat . I think I hate that word fat. Heavy is a better word I think. Sounds nicer.

This message is written for people like Heidi.

Beware of false prophets who come disguised as harmless sheep, but are really wolves that will tear you apart.”

Since my goal this week is helping to show who Heidi is. I know I am not the only one that has been hurt by her. Less then two weeks ago I THOUGHT I had the truth from Heidi on how she felt. I wanted to see a updated picture of Heidi. And she got upset with me about this.

Re:Kimmer and Singinglass ( front page ladies) 2 Weeks, 5 Days ago
Hey Amy! I sure appreciate your continued interest in how we’re doing on the front page. It wouldn’t be Monday with your post for new pics, right? When new pics & updates are available they’ll be posted OK? Meanwhile, you’re a stone’s throw from goal so get yourself busy and post on all of your challenges! Time’s running out before summer!!! I know if you have time to ask about our pics, you’ve got time to keep up on your challenges.

You look fantastic!

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Re:Kimmer and Singinglass ( front page ladies) 2 Weeks, 5 Days ago
I think the last time I asked about any pictures was months ago. And I had no idea that was on a Monday also. LOL
I guess I was excited to see updated pictures. Especially now that Singinglass has entered onederland and got a new hair cut. I can not wait to see how great she looks. But I am sure you will update your pics when you are ready to show off your new weight loss. I think we are just all excited to see how good you look.I have been pretty active with all my threads on here. I have even had some extra time to answer some PM’s about my weight loss. Seems there are quite a few who want to know what I eat and how often. As most know I spend lot’s of time in my threads and working on my goal daily. Maybe one day I will get there. Since I am close I have been trying to figure out a maintenance plan, so I do not gain my weight back. Losing it once was enough and Christmas taught me a lesson.

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Re:Kimmer and Singinglass ( front page ladies) 2 Weeks, 5 Days ago
Amy, you’re a beautiful beautiful girl! If anyone should be SUPER proud of themselves for what they’ve accomplished … that would be YOU! I love looking at your progress photos, too! Honestly, you don’t look like the same person … your kids must be soooo proud!
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Re:Kimmer and Singinglass ( front page ladies) 2 Weeks, 4 Days ago
Some days I am proud but others I just worry about finding a way to keep it off. I had a gain over the holidays that I still have not recovered from. The thought of re losing weight over and over is NOT something I look forward to.Trust me..my pictures are all me..the good and the omg I had no idea I looked like that befores..lol

Ya know Kimmer..when you say such wonderful sweet things to me like in your last post….you make it hard for me to believe all the rumors about how much you HATE me. lol

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Amy, I couldn’t hate you if I tried. I admire you so much, I really do. No doubt I sounded snippy in post #2 and for that I’m truly sorry. Busy week, MORE deadlines and … well, you get the picture. Not a good excuse, but an explanation at best.I totally LOVE your panorama of pics! That’s a testament to you, girlfriend! Hard work, setting your mind on success and overcoming unfathomable obstacles. You did that!

Amy, if I offended you I’m deeply sorry.

Quick, somebody graphically talented please make me a “No Snarkiness” logo pronto!

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Ladies…for those who are still there…this is a example for how she works. She admires me, she could never hate me, and on and on. She even said she was sorry for being snarky with me. I think banning me for asking about flank steak is not snarky it is crazy.

So this time last week…I was not strong enough to leave. I was sure I needed Kimkins site. I had fought hard to stay with some friends that have seemed to move on without me there. The truth is…no matter how hard this has been….it is easier then I thought it would be. I have not fallen apart. I have not binged eat. Heck I got back in the 130’s the day after I left. I had been working really hard to get back there since Thanksgiving.

There is life after Kimmer. There is weight loss without being on her board. So all of you ladies who PM’d me so often. You said you trusted me and respected me. Then trust me today. You can do this. You can feel good. You can come to other groups…and we can do it together. I promise there are many people to help all of us.

Tomorrow is Philip’s operation. It is so important that it goes well. It is just dangerous and really hard to think about. But we are blessed to have wonderful DR and a wonderful faith that all will go perfect as plan.

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12 Responses to “Has It Been A Week?”

  1. BamaGal Says:

    Great Post Amy!!

    Your initial interaction about the pics is probably what Heidi off—she just had to fester for awhile. You are accomplishing things she never could.

    As for the flank steak vs flat iron steak question—no they aren’t the same thing. Flat iron steak is cut from the shoulder of a steer. Flank steak is a beef steak cut from the belly muscles of the cow. Many flank steak recipes use marinades or braising since it is a tougher cut of meat.

  2. beckyw Says:

    Amy – I have stepped back from the public eye in Kimkins situation, but I want to step back up and offer my encouragement and support to you, if that helps. I SO relate to what you are going through! I know it is hard for some to understand, but, as I said at the time, leaving Kimkins felt very much like breaking free from an abusive relationship —- just as scary, just as traumatic, and just as liberating. It really does get better as time goes on. You are doing so well!

    I went back and read the emails we exchanged. I guess I really was pretty blunt. I am sorry. I was speaking from the perspective that I had gained over time, and it was probably too much to share with you all at once. I really did mean it out of love and concern, and I hope you felt that.

    I have the utmost respect for you, as a person, as a wife and mother to your family, as a caring friend to many. Life’s trials have formed you into a rare treasure.

    That Heidi Diaz doesn’t see and appreciate the goodness in you says more about her than it says about you. Her loss.

    As always, Amy, you and your family are in my prayers.

  3. mrsmenopausal Says:

    Amy, I admire you for speaking up about your experiences with Kimkins and Heidi Diaz, and reaching out to members there. Her comments to you are more examples of her manipulation.
    You are stronger than I think you realize.

    Phillip and your family are in my prayers.

    My blog: Weighing The Facts

  4. bluesuederebel Says:

    Amy, My thoughts and prayers are with you, Philip, and your family as you go through tonight, tomorrow, and the days after.

  5. mayberryfan Says:

    Amy, I can’t decide from this post if Becky was nice to you or not. Nevertheless, you know now in just one short week that you can succeed without Kimkins. I applaud you for that! It will get easier and I don’t doubt for one second that you will reach your goal.

    Many prayers are being said for you and for Philip! Hope all goes well for him tomorrow! Stay strong. 🙂

  6. kimkinscam Says:

    Amy, it would seem that the healing process is ‘in the works’ for you. Each blog post you put up, you seem stronger and stronger. My hope is that each day gets easier and easier for you, as well.

    My prayers will be with you, your family and Philip during this difficult time. Please keep us posted as to his progress. God Bless!
    MJR-

  7. 1slickchick Says:

    Wow, a world wind week it has been. You do seem stronger in today’s post – but I know each day, each hour, each minute it can snatched away if we let the negative back in. Be strong — for you, for your family, and most importantly for Philip. May his day tomorrow be a great one and bring all the hope and promise and prayer that he so wants and needs.

  8. 2big4mysize Says:

    Amy thanks for posting about the mixed signals kimmer was giving you. Did you notice anybody else on the inside she was doing that to who could become her next victim?
    Prayers going up fior Phillip and your whole family.

    And have you got a picnic basket packed for you to munch on in case this one lasts longer then the doc thinks and for the hours you will be sitting there with him?

  9. prudentiablog Says:

    Amy, you DO sound stronger today. We will be praying for Philip tonight and tomorrow.

    Becky is right on – you ARE coming out of an abusive relationship. I blogged about that very thing a few days ago.

    Hang tight, girlfriend.

  10. barbarab2 Says:

    You have come a long way in a short period of time. You are stronger than you ever thought you were. And the distance from Heidi has made you see things you may have possibly known before, but on a different level. I think you will be a beacon of hope for other KKers. Prayers for Philip and your entire family. Keep up the good work. You have a great blog going.

  11. katinsac Says:

    Amy, you are so strong, I aplaude you. I know your posting on this blog is very hard for you but if you can help just one person still over at the KK site, you have done a lot.

    Prayers for Phillip, you and your family. We are here for you.

  12. fineline123 Says:

    Amy, you don’t know me but I have been praying for you for a long time. I am still recovering from the damage that kimkins did to me. I read through the fascination thread everyday and the even though I rarely participate, the people who post there have helped me tremendously. I think you are a very strong person and you seem to always handle things with dignity and honesty. You are the polar opposite of Heidi Diaz.


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