One thing I am not is weak. I may feel weak at times. I may seem weak at times. But I am not weak. And I am sure all of this will make me even stronger. The one thing that stands out in my mind after I hit the publish button is….oh wait there are a few things. But the main thing is…I sort seem like I am being needy. The funny thing is…I really do not like when people do that. In fact when Heidi came back to the group ….she seemed to change. She was no longer the KNOW IT ALL. She seemed more real for a short time..like a few minutes. Ha. But the one thing that stood out to me is she ACTED needy. And I fell for it for a day or so. Then it just annoyed me. How could she not know what she should and should not do on HER OWN diet? How could she really be asking questions about shakes and fast etc. I thought she was the queen of this. Then there was the diabetes. If I read one more post asking some question that my child could answer. It was a weak try at being needy. Needy so we would feel for her and help her and FORGET what she had done. That may of worked for some but not many. So I do not want to come across as that way. Yes I am hurt. Yes I am worn down. Yes I feel embarrassed by how I ALLOWED her to treat me. But I am not weak and I am not stupid. So if I came across as needy . I am sorry. But for the person who seems to have a certain way about her wording that reminds me of ….well never mind….but your e-mail with the name calling and the rumors of what people think and are saying. Take a long look in the mirror. Yes I have done some things I so wish I could bring back. But you know I am so blessed. I have a DH of over 20 years. I just lost 90 pounds and now can enjoy my role as a mom to my 4 children. I have never had to even wonder if I had used them for my own bad deeds. And God has blessed Philip daily. Speaking of Philip. Those who pray , please lift Philip up often these next few days. He is facing another operation next week. And things with him are not stable right now.
I now am off to get my info gathered for the Big chicken Diet plan info. Watch for that update.